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As Valentine’s Day approaches, the air fills with anticipation, love, and perhaps a touch of apprehension for many. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, this day offers a unique opportunity for self-reflection and self-care. As a psychologist, I encourage you to embrace this moment with mindfulness and self-compassion.

Renowned psychologist Kirsten Neff (2003) emphasizes the importance of self-care and self-compassion in promoting overall well-being). So, bearing this in mind, instead of dreading Valentine’s Day, consider it an occasion to prioritise activities that nurture your soul and bring you joy. Engage in activities that resonate with your passions and make you feel alive, whether it’s attending a sports event, indulging in your favourite movie, or simply taking a leisurely stroll.

The true magic of Valentine’s Day lies not in the activity itself, but in the attitude, you bring to it. Embrace who you are, celebrate your victories, and acknowledge areas for growth with kindness and understanding. Self-acceptance and self-compassion are linked to greater psychological resilience and emotional well-being (Neff, Kirkpatrick, & Rude, 2007). By embracing your authentic self, you empower yourself to navigate life’s challenges with grace and resilience.

Moreover, as you revel in self-compassion, take a moment to extend kindness to others. Acts of compassion not only benefit the recipient but also enhance your own sense of fulfilment and connectedness (Sprecher & Fehr, 2005). Whether it’s reaching out to a friend in need, volunteering in your community, or simply offering a smile to a stranger, small gestures of kindness can have a profound impact on both the giver and the receiver.

This Valentine’s Day, let us shift our perspective from one of apprehension to one of self-love and compassion for others. Embrace the beauty of who you are, celebrate your journey, and spread kindness wherever you go. Remember, love begins with yourself and with sharing this love.

References:

Neff, K. D. (2003). Development and validation of a scale to measure self-compassion. Self and Identity, 2(3), 223-250.

Neff, K. D., Kirkpatrick, K. L., & Rude, S. S. (2007). Self-compassion and adaptive psychological functioning. Journal of Research in Personality, 41(1), 139-154.

Sprecher, S., & Fehr, B. (2005). Compassionate love for close others and humanity. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 22(5), 629-651.

Many multinational companies have the need for employees to travel to other countries that they are not citizens of to accomplish a temporary task or project. These employees are known as expatriates (McNulty & De Cieri, 2016). Culture-shock is stressors that most expatriates face when living in a country that they are not familiar with. They may experience unfamiliar cultures, attitudes, ways of life, foreign language can be daunting. How well these highly skilled employees adjust impacts the success and the speed at which the assignment can be completed (Sterle, Vervoort & Verhofstadt, 2018).

This experience contains what is considered to be major life events stressors, i.e., starting a new job, moving overseas into a new home, partner or spouse potentially giving up or changing their careers, children changing schools, changes in routine, cultural and financial status, separation from established social and support networks, difficulties learning and communicating in a foreign language.

Failure to adjust can result in reduced mental well-being and increased psychological distress including depression, increased substance use and reduced work performance (Aycan, 1997; Foyle et al., 1998; Truman et al., 2011; Sterle, Vervoort & Verhofstadt, 2018). Psychological support in the form of counselling, mobilization of social support, psychoeducation and family counselling may assist individuals to develop coping skills to facilitate adjustment and subjective well-being. Assimilation to the new host country is not the only support expatriates need but also assistance when returning to their home countries. Expatriates may have difficulty to reassimilate as their values, goals and life views may have been changed by living abroad. Also, their home country has undergone political changes, their social support network has undergone developmental changes of their own too. Therefore, developing a repatriation plan may assist in preparing them for their return to their country.

Social and emotional support together with psychological support with a therapist experienced working with an expatriate community has been found to assist the individual in coping, adjustment and to promote their psychological well-being. If individuals feel more confident and are coping better, it will have a positive impact on their work performance, hereby, increasing the success of the work assignment.

For further information on how to develop a psychological support program for yourself or employee consult the following website therapyandwellbeing.co.za or contact us on drcynthia@therapy andwellbeing.com

Further Reading

Aycan, Z. (1997). Expatriate adjustment as a multifaceted phenomenon. International Journal of Human Resource Management, 8(4), 434–456.

Foyle, M.F., Beer, M.D. & Watson, J.P.L. (1998). Expatriate mental health. Acta Psychiatrica Scandinavica, 97, 278–283.

McNulty, Y. & De Cieri,  (2016). Linking global mobility and global talent management: the role of ROI. Employee Relations 38(1):8-30.

Pollock, D.C. & Van Reken, R.E. (2009). Third culture kids: The experience of growing up among worlds. Boston:Nicholas Brealy.

Sanchez, J.I., Spector, P.E. & Cooper, C.L. (2000). Adapting to a boundaryless world: A developmental expatriate model. Academy of Management Perspectives, 14(2), 96–106.

Sterle, M. F., Vervoort, T. & Verhofstadt, L .L. (2018).  ocial Support, Adjustment, and Psychological Distress of Help-Seeking Expatriates. Psychologica Belgica, 58(1), pp. 297–317, DOI: https://doi.org/10.5334/pb.464

Truman, S.D., Sharar, D.A. & Pompe, J.C. (2011). The mental health status of expatriate versus U.S. domestic workers. International Journal of Mental Health, 40(4), 3–18.

van Erp, K.J.P.M. (2011). When worlds collide: The role of justice, conflict and personality for expatriate couples’ adjustment. Doctoral dissertation, Rijksuniversiteit Groningen, The

Netherlands.